| 22:17:50 28 June 2020
On forum: 06/28/2020
a Cordon's short story|
Stalkers, i had bad day today...
Sidorovich made me kill three of my Loners mates, one of them was fake rookie and the other was a fake representative and the last one was one of my first ever friends that i made in the Loners camp when i first played shadow of Chernobyl.
first one was a fake representative, Sidorovich told me when i asked for a minor job that there is a scam representative who uses Sidorovich's name in marketing old expired food and jammed weapons and broken guns and stuff, when i accepted the job i thought at its time that i was going to kill a bandit or a random person in the zone because he didn't mention it was going to be a Loner, sadly...i killed him while he was playing guitar around the camp fire in Loner's camp and he was surrounded by his friends, they stood up and pulled out there guns and i thought they were going to kill me but they didn't like they knew before i was coming to kill him, i did that barely hard because for one reason, he was my fellow Loner but was not my friend he was neutral fellow, after i did what it takes i looked at his corpse and while looking i asked myself " what the fuck i have done? " then i took myself to Sidorovich to inform him that i did the job, he gave me a Tourist delight (1) and a flower stone, i got traumatized when i saw these stupid job's rewards as a payment for what i did, i asked myself another question " for real? my fellow's blood is that cheap? "
second target was a spy (Sidorovich said that in the job description) and he was yet another Loner, he was also a neutral fellow, i was surprised that Sidorovich requested from me to kill another Loner, i was having a bad mood after the first target and i was questioning myself hundred times before i kill the second target, HELL i was thinking of cancelling the job but i said NO and i am going to check out who he really is, it turns out that he wasn't a spy or fake rookie or some kind of other faction's scout at all, he was just a regular Loner, i went back to Sidorovich to cancel the job but something told me to not, i returned to the target Loner but this time he was in his house (the ruined roof house on the left of Sidorovich's place) sleeping while apparently having nightmares also it was rainy at the time and there was a thunder, i scrolled to my Fort 12 mk2 and aimed at his head while he sleeping and pulled the trigger on him, with one cheap standard bullet from my Fort 12 gun he died...painfully, i felt his pain like i was the one who got shot in the head while sleeping, i felt like he was having a nightmare of him feeling that there was someone is going to kill him, maybe he felt that i was coming to assassinate him, i returned to Sidorovich to inform him about the job is done and he gave me a cheap flesh stone, this anomaly stone for killing the Loner????? after killing him and got my reward i was feeling like his ancestor or ghost was following me behind all the time, my soul was shivering inside my body.
third target...was a...a friend of mine, a friendly fellow Loner, yes another fellow Loner, Sidorovich wanted me to kill him for no clear reason like it is for nothing at all, just kill while you are keeping your mouth shut, i went to the target also know as my first friend ever who i made when i first started the game, i knew him as a friend after when i saw him bleeding on the way in front of the our Loner's camp before i go meet wolf's scout, i don't want to change the topic so let's get back to the point, as i was saying i went to the target's area and he was sitting as the same place as the second target was sitting on, the campfire where captain wolf is always standing by, i came from behind and pulled out my Obokan rifle fully loaded with all 30 bullets and i was aiming at my friend's head from behind while Cpt. wolf was starring at me like he was waiting for me o pull the trigger on him, i was eating my lips till they bleeded and i was sweating while my face is getting red and my index finger was itching to click the left button on my mouse, i took a breathe from my nose and held it while i was looking away from my PC screen and closing my eyes, my index quickly hit the left button like a one shot burst in his head and all of a sudden his eyes saw blackout and didn't know what happened to him and who had killed him but i was sure after he died he has found out who did, ME!!!
the Obokan burst's sound rang in my ears while i was looking away from my monitor and i was nearly going to cry and i didn't even have the guts to look at his dead body or loot him from his stuff, i went back to Sidorovich and informed him and he gave me for killing my first friend was just couple of suasages (2) and cossack vodka bottles (5) , i killed my friend...not for money or forced to do that or roubles, is it was just to get food? i don't what i have done and i don't why did i choose to take jobs from him (Sidorovich) ?
i looked for the bodies of my fellows and my friend, i dragged them all the way to Sidorovich's place (inside his place itself) and putted them sitting-like posture against the walls, why did i do that?
simply for just one reason...to remind myself of my dirty cheap rewarded betrayal to my friend and fellows death, their souls for just some vodka and stupid shit.
i can't believe what i have done after this, i am very sure that the other two fellow mates that i killed would be my friends in the future sometime, i was dropping few tears while Sidorovich was looking in my face and knew that i can do anything or kill anyone for him even if they were my friends, the dirty look in his eyes on me was horrifying that told me that i am cheap none trustworthy friend to be with Loners, i don't deserve to make friends, i can't make friends and expect to kill them later for orders by my captain or my leader, i hated Sidorovich and myself at the same time, i was returning to my place (the attic of the house behind CPT. wolf) after this while looking down to the ground with my mouse aiming down and remembering the imaginary dirty words that Sidorovich's eyes was trying to tell me when i was in front of him that describes me, i can't forgive myself for what i have done and i am very very certain that my friend is as well.
i quicksaved my game and exit to windows and said "enough stalker for today...or shall is say for this week long"
i am so sorry if was overly emotional while describing what happened to me in stalker shadow of chernobyl today, i was just shocked thinking of what if this might happen to me or someone's else in real life, killing friends because of my boss' orders telling me to do so, again i am sorry if i was overly emotional, and sorry because i wrote too much in this post i just wrote what i felt and went through, thanks for reading my topic to the last waord, i hope you understand my experience and just try to imagine it and maybe you can read it before you sleep to see what i mean.
i am very very proud of GSC games that they made this game and all stlakers titles, this is my first stalker game i am playing (SoC) and very amazed and interested to see if all other stalker games are like this because it is really true as everybody said the game's atmosphere
makes you create your own story by yourself, great job GSC games, i hopee they read this short story.
NOTE: this story is 100% real event i didn't fake anything, all that really happened as i described, everything my emotions, gameplay and all that.
my message: don't do anything whatever your boss asks you, it might cross your morals lines and makes you takeaway your most loved things in you life and change you 360 degree, stay loyal to your friends, and i hope you learned any other lesson from my short story more than i said.
stay safe in the zone!
| 02:00:46 29 June 2020
Veteran of the Psychic Wars
On forum: 05/12/2007
Message edited by:
a Cordon's short story|
Welcome to the GSC Forums!
I greatly appreciate the time and effort you took to write your story. I tried to check the last box "other answer" but the poll would not let me do that. By default the first box was checked and when I undid it and checked the last one, it told me I had done none. Anyway I ended up checking all of them, to see why it was wonky and it did all but the one I wanted. Anyway.
Your story and remorse were very good. I think it's totally normal to feel apprehension, revolt and being disgusted at what you have done. Despite being a Game, the Stalker Games have such an immersion of atmosphere, setting and music, that it is hard not to feel something for the actions of your character and the events that unfold before you that you have a choice in. While I might have done the first two kills as a newbie, I don't think I would have killed Tolik, if I followed your story correctly.
If you would like to try to start your Game again, I can give you a solution to redo your Game and resolve the dilemma you found yourself in. However it will take a little more time if you have it. Go ahead and accept the tasks to kill people ( Loners ) who are located outside the Rookie Village. Go to them and instead of killing them, simply hang out with them. If they move, follow them but don't kill them. You will find that most any target will eventually get killed by running into Bandits or Mutants and if they kill them, you will also get a completed task message and you can live with that choice as it was the Zone that took them and not you.
Another option for taking similar assassination tasks with having more control over them is this. Make a Manual Save right before you talk to Sidorovich. Talk to Sidorovich to get your mission. If it is located outside the Rookie Village and in a location near hostiles ( Bandits and/or Mutants ) take the mission. If you are given an assassination task you don't like ( a friend you know, a location not safe like inside the Rookie Village since there's a low chance of Bandit or Mutant attack or for any other reason you find ) simply reload your Manual Save and try again with Sidorovich. You will find the Game randomly moves around each time the target and if it does not, keep trying. While some mission locations are fixed, the assassination tasks are not.
Using these two methods to let others do the "dirty work" ( when you have friendly or neutral Faction targets ) and controlling the location, will greatly help in making the Game more morally sound for you and your character.
Good Hunting Stalker.
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